SlamBall Is The Shit

And its coming back thanks to Pat Croce and the original creators. Spike needs to pick this back up... I'm sure your audience can do with one less hour of "That 70's Show" or "CSI: whatever city you happen to be in."

Slamball gives hope to people my size to happen to not be afraid of trampolines or physical violence on a basketball court. I happen to not be a member of either group, but back in 9th grade before the trampoline/basketball court incident I might have been encouraged to pursue this sport.

Stephen Curry will murdalize your bracket.

The sophmore from Davidson went off for 30 points, 25 of them in the second half to come back from 17 points down to upset Georgetown. Georgetown shot 63.4 percent from the field and still lost! The Hoyas had this game if they hadn't turned it over 20 times.

This Curry kid's draft stock just went through the roof... he's played two games in this tournament and has 70 points. He gave Adam Morrison another reason to cry when he went off for 30 points in the second half against Gonzaga.

Pappa Curry, also known as former NBA sharp shooter Dell Curry, must be proud of the way his son has performed in the tourney. Dell was the 1993-1994 sixth man of the year, ranks 17th all-time in 3-pointers made and is the all-time leading scored for the Charlotte Hornets, but his son seems to have a real shot at surpassing those accomplishments if his college career is any indication. He was second in scoring among freshmen right behind a guy by the name of Kevin Durrant last season and this season he dropped 24 on UNC, 20 on Duke, 29 against NC State and 15 against UCLA.

I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that Cinderella is named Davidson this year. Forget Nova or Western Kentucky... Davidson has a real shot to beat Wisconsin. Georgetown only allowed 57.6 points per game, a mere 3 points more than the Badger's best in the nation 54.3 ppg. Obviously Davidson can handle defensive teams.

Why is it that I never know this shit prior to writing up my brackets?

Da Bears Are Bery, Bery Angry at Berrian

I know I'm late on this one, but Bernard Berrian is now a member of the Vikings. It feels so good to steal one of the better members of a divisional foe's squad. Berrian is a speedster who can stretch the field while actually catching the ball. He'll be able to take the pressure off of the run game, and if all goes as I have it planned in my head he could be a big help in the development of Tarvaris Jackson as a QB and of Sidney Rice as a receiver. Jackson has never had a go to guy, Rice will benefit from extra coverage being thrown Berrian's way, and Purple Jesus will not see 9 men in the box every time he enters the game.

He's no Chris Carter or Randy Moss, but he's also not Troy Williamson. This team has a great defense that is aging, and if we want to take advantage of that defense we needed to pick up a quality veteran wide out. Berrian was 50 yards from a 1,000 yard season and hauled in 5 touchdowns. That's two more touchdowns than Williamson has in his 3 year career. I don't think well have a kick ass offense next year, but we might have a kick butt offense now that the passing game has a life.

On top of all of this we effectively squashed every ounce of offense out of the Bears. Who is their best receiver now? Devin Hester? Good luck, Rex. Maybe you should hand the ball off to... no, that didn't work last year. Maybe you should practice getting sacked and throwing the ball out of bounds.

Please Pick Up Donte Stallworth

If you wear purple on Sundays (and the occasional Monday night) you are undeniably aware of the fact that the Minnesota Vikings lack a passing game. One of the many reasons for this is on his way to Jacksonville, Thanks Mike. Another reason is that the team had no go to guy on the field. I'm not getting down on Bobby Wade, because I think he'll be a quality slot receiver, but he is not and never will be "The Man." I also love our selection of Sidney Rice and think that one day he will be a big time receive, but right now he's just to young. Aundrae Allison was a great selection for where he went in the draft last year, but I think he should be used as a return man and to spell our starters.

We need to sign Stallworth and I think we have an in with Brad Childress as our head coach. I know that they never actually crossed paths, but the know some of the same people. Childress was the man who spent his time in Philadelphia coaching Donovan McNabb. Stallworth, as a receiver, no doubt sparked up a friendship with McNabb. Stallworth is a solid receiver, I had him on my fantasy team and he always produced even though he was usually the third option in that powerful offense.

If this team picked up Donte Stallworth he would become a credible threat through the air, give T-Jack some more confidence in throwing the ball, allow Rice, Wade and possibly even VithsanteShaincoe some more room to work with and keep the defense from loading the box. We would have more of a balanced offense with the reciprocal relationship that Stallworth and Peterson/Taylor. I know that this idea is a stretch, but having Stallworth instead of Williamson is a major upgrade and will give peace of mind to the older members of our defense. It will allow us to draft a receiver in a later round and focus on other needs like safety and defensive end on the first day.

In related news The Daily Norsman is reporting that Kelly Holcomb has been released, Heath Farwell has been offered a one year contract worth about $1.4 million and Dwight Smith has been offered a 2 year contract by the Detroit Lions.

I wonder if David Carr is open to backing up T-Jack now that he's been cut by the Panthers. I know hes not great, but hes an upgrade from both Holcomb and Brooks Bolinger.

This Right Here is Where The Season Broke Down...

...tore if you will. I keep on hearing that this isn't a bad ligament tear, but anytime I think about a running back's knee and the flexible fibrous tissue that holds it together not being 100% I can't help but think of the pain I've gotten from accidentally snapping a rubber band and imagined what it felt like for the band. What in the hell am supposed to watch with Purple Jesus sidelined? I'll give Chester one game to impress me and I swear to god if the start Purple Judas at Quarterback I'm turning it to "Meet the Press" and lord knows I want no part of that.

Oh Well, at least we didn't get shut out by the Packers for the first time in series history.

All Praise Purple Jesus

This is what I worship every Sunday. There are Six GMs banging their heads against the wall after seeing Adrian Peterson destroy one of the best defenses in the NFL. I can also think of one head coach and one starting quarterback that should bow down and thank Peterson for taking the pressure off and most likely A) prolonging Childress' head coaching career for at least a little while longer and B) allowing Jackson to develop into a starting quarterback while actually playing starting quarterback. Without Peterson, Childress may not have made it past this season with this organization and Jackson would have been given up on when the lack of offense is not entirely his fault. (I haven't even heard anyone say anything about Jackson's 9-23 day or the fact that 60 of his 139 passing yards came on one play)

I know it was only one game and the Vikings could revert to the team that we've had to endure for the last 20+ games but I really don't think that's going to happen. This team might not make the playoffs but I think they'll at least be playing for a chance at the end of the year. Before the season began I figured the team would win 4 games. We may be two and three, but we've outscored the opponent 101-90 and have never lost a game by more than a TD.

I told you... I told you that all the team needs is 24 points to win. They got 34 points. Peterson scored 18 of those by himself (with a couple blocks here and there)and is the only reason Longwell has a new career high. The former Sooner and current Bad Ass had 224 yards on the ground and 128 returning kicks. I still don't like him returning kicks. Don't get me wrong, I loved him returning the last kick and Childress made the right decision but that is the only scenario where Peterson should be returning kicks.

Even the game plan was better this week. The passing game may not have worked so well but we stretched the field early and on more than one occasion, though it only actually worked once (Thanks for finally using that glue I sent you Stonehands). The team also tried play action a couple of times. Its too bad we can't get 200 yards out of Peterson every game to allow the passing game more time get itself together. I'd still like Sidney Rice to get more looks... he only had one catch, but he laid out for it and fortified my feeling that he'll be a great receiver one day. He probably could have gotten more looks if the team made it into the redzone, but when the other team can't make it there either its not so scary to think about.

The defense did a good job for the first three quarters. Outside of Winfield falling down (which sucks, but I'm not about to complain about our best Corner and one of the hardest hitters in the NFL) the Vikings shut the bears down. The fourth quarter was a different story... I think the D hit the locker room as soon as Dwight Smith got his INT and forgot to look at the clock. This includes Smith who got a great view of Devin Hester's second TD of the day. Marcus McCauly missed a sure INT that would have saved me that anxious feeling you get when the Vikings take a game with a lead of 7 or less into its final minutes. I'd also like some more sacks.

I almost forgot... E.J. Henderson is the shit and crushed that fullback to end the half. Now go watch Osi Umenyiora and Michael Strahan rip Joey's limbs off

Slowly I gain respect for Visanthe Shaincoe

Did you guys see this? First our tight end begins to catch a few passes here and there when nobody else seems to be able to and then I find out he has a sense of humor. Maybe next we'll find out his goal after football is to become an offensive coordinator and he draws up some useful plays for this season.

Who am I kidding? The catches and a half a chuckle are more than I ever expected.

I hope Brad Childress chokes on his own Mustache.

We’ve been duped… Bamboozled!

We’ve been sold expensive diet water. Brad Childress came to Minnesota under the guise of an offensive guru. I’ve watched 20 games led by the ‘stache and I can’t think of a single offensive outburst. How many times in the last 20 games do you think we’ve scored 24 points or more? 5… Brad Childress’ “Kick-Ass Offence” scores 24 or more points 25 percent of the time. We’re 5 for 5 in those games but first we have to get to 24. That’s 3 TDs and a field goal… not too much to ask considering the defense provides one of those touchdowns on a regular basis and tends to put the offense in good position to score most of the time.

Did you know that Visanthe Shaincoe was the leading receiver versus the Chiefs? When the tight end leads all receivers that is a bad sign. That is a combination of checkdowns and a leader who refuses to take chances. Childress’ offense is horrible, no matter what quarterback he puts out there they end up looking like Linus from peanuts sucking their thumb and grasping onto their blanket for dear life. That card he holds over his face during a game is actually only empty tick-tack-toe boards which he and Darrell Bevell fill out during the game

The team seems afraid to commit to Tarvaris Jackson and I wonder how bad his injury really is. Jackson and those receivers had better lock themselves away in the confines of Winter park and develop some sort of rapport. My suggestion is that Jackson focus on Bobby Wade and Sidney Rice. If Jackson and those receivers run routes until they’ve burned a path in the turf (ala Peyton and his guys) they might be able to find each other on game day. I don’t want to see Kelly Holcolm any more this year barring an injury… let Jackson throw his interceptions, take his hits and lose some games because he will be better for it.

I faintly remember a Vikings team that stretched the field a few years back. I know that team had Randy Moss and Daunte Culpepper, but you don’t need players of that caliber in order to stretch the field. I saw Dwayne Bowe and Damon Huard do it just the other week. I doesn’t take pro-bowl players, it takes a game plan and, maybe even more important, a willingness to deviate from the game plan when it falls apart. Look, I’m not being a delusional Homer here, I know that my team is bad but these last three losses don’t feel like they were inevitable. In each one you can point to one or two things that could have led to a win had they gone differently.

If the run game works why doesn’t the play action? If Adrian Peterson AKA Purple Jesus goes off for 100 yards in the first half why give him two carries in the second… and if you think he’s fragile because of the collarbone then why in the hell is he returning kicks? Are you going to throw to a gamecock? Why not Sidney Rice? He seems pretty good at an endzone jump ball and if I remember correctly that was his bread and butter in South Carolina.

I’ve got a great idea for you- lets put Troy Williamson at Cornerback… that way we won’t get burned by whoever Cedric Griffin is covering and it a plus when Williamson catches the ball instead of a prayer answered. Any one of these suggestions would be helpful if it were not for Childress. Childress is Mchale’s love of Boston and inking big deals for mediocre players. Childress is Carl Pohlad’s billions of dollars never to be spent on the Twins. In a nutshell Childress is Minnesota sports. Expect him to be around for far too long.

Todd Lowber: We Hardly Knew Ye (And Other Vikings Movement)

Probably because Division III Basketball players have no place in the NFL. Cross your fingers for the scout team, buddy.

This move, coupled with a few other cuts and Tyler "Pigpen" Thigpen's move to the scout team opens up room for Kelly Holcomb to move in and "compete" for the back-up quarterback position. I have a feeling that it will be a lot safer having a 12 year veteran on the active roster than having a rookie who happens to be the first ever player drafted out of the Big South. Holcomb only cost the Vikings a 6th round pick in the 2009 draft and that pretty good for a back-up QB.

I have a feeling that Lowber has a better chance being paid by the Vikings than Bollinger come next season. An injury prone QB with a 2-7 lifetime record and a preseason passer rating of 30.4 is just not what an NFL team looks for in their most important position. He'll stay on the team for the year simply because the team gave up a draft pick for him and Thigpen isn't quite ready to sit on the big boy's bench. Next year Bolinger is either wearing a Chicago Rush jersey or a polo that reads University of North Dakota.

Man, this offense is gonna rock!

Adrian Peterson Has More Money Than Me

The former Sooner running back and the Minnesota Vikings have agreed to terms on 6 year contract that could pay up to 40 million and guarantees 17 million. He managed to miss five practices in three days, but seeing as the Vikings have one of the more grueling camps and there are still a few concerns about Peterson’s collarbone I think everything will be just fine. Plus the world already knows that the purple people eaters won’t have a playoff bound team anyway.

The rookie running back and Chester Taylor should alleviate some pressure from Tarvaris Jackson’s first full year as our quarterback. I’d like to think of this upcoming season as one year-long lesson for Jackson, Peterson, Chad Greenway (who never played a regular season game) and the talk of training camp, Marcus McCauley. Hopefully they acquaint themselves with the league, make their mistakes, make their mark and come back the following year with a fire and couple nice additions from next year’s draft. All I can hope for is a glimpse of what the future might hold. I feel like I’ve needed to say that with all of the Minnesota teams since I was about, oh… 8. I’m getting sick of this, but Peterson feels like his name could be up there with Barry Sanders, Walter Peyton, Jim Brown and Ladanian Tomlinson by the time his career is over.

Hopefully the Vikings will be able to build a team around this young core of players, especially Peterson, and not waste talent. Will the Vikings front office have the foresight to build their team through the draft and only sign quality veterans to contracts that they actually deserve? Lord knows Kevin McHale didn’t do that for the Timber wolves and KG. I find it interesting that on the day that one sports star arrives to begin his career in Minnesota another has most likely seen his last day playing for his team.

Congratulations on your new contract Adrian. Now go earn it.

Holy Crap! Jason Tyner Hit a Home run

I. AM. SPEECHLESS.

Brad Childress says we'll get to see this guy starting tomorrow.

These are highlights from Troy Williamson's time at South Carolina. As you all know Vikings training camp starts tomorrow and somehow Williamson has become the veteran receiver with all of the experience. Nike claims to have fixed old Stonehand's eyes (They make shoes for that?) This is yet to be determined. Also yet to be determined are the contracts of fellow Gamecock and receiver Sidney Rice and most importantly Oklahoma running back Adrian Peterson.

The Pessimist in me says that a young and unproven receiving core and quarterback position can only bring us 4 wins. The optimist says that the tandem of Peterson and Chester Taylor will destroy D-lines and the defense will be just as good if not better to get us to .500. Hopefully Cedric Griffin can keep his pants on and build upon a very solid rookie year and Marcus McCauley (who just signed his contract) can some how magically defend the pass with some help From Erasmus James and Kenechi Udezi (for God's sakes).

This team won't win the division and a wild card berth is almost as laughable. We're going to win 6 games on the strength of our run stopping and ground game and maybe we'll see a few bright spots. I'm just hoping that this new version of the Kick-ass offense can get a couple of touchdowns through the air and let me watch my team into the 4th quarter.

Nu-Basketball

This is something that I’ve been thinking about basically since the emergence of Steve Nash as a superstar, and something that has gained some validity with the Warriors beating the Mavericks. I can feel a change in the NBA style of play, one that turns post-up players such as Shaq and Yao into dinosaurs. There is a de-emphasis of defense, which is in turn replaced by passing, the three pointer and an up-tempo game. The Suns, Warriors and on occasion teams like Denver and the Wizards laugh in the face of conventional basketball thought. To quote John Madden “ To win the game, you have to score more points than your opponent!”

College teams put three guards and two forwards (or vise versa) on the floor and never bother to nominate a center. I see this happening down the road in the NBA and so does Henry Abbott… two starting seven footers who only post-up when necessary, one player between 6-8 and 6-11 playing the slashing/ jump shooting/ long ball threat and two players who can ball handle and pass. Two jump shooting seven footers has yet to work for the Timberwolves, but nothing ever works for them. They also needed a passing point guard, and though we employ several of them not a one was a good passer.

I feel like passing will become more important than shot blocking. The post-up player no longer matters if he can’t get back on defense before the other team takes it’s shot. The Up-tempo European style brought to the U.S. by Mike D’antoni, and now working in Golden state makes me wonder whether there are other European coaches with the ability to turn a Memphis Grizzly’s team (who score in bunches when they win, but don’t win often enough) from the cellar to the top.

Conventional thought leads me to believe that if I had the first pick in the upcoming draft I would take Oden, but as I watch these playoffs and see that the traditional center has been canceled out by the speed of smaller teams. Speed beats size. Durrant trumps Oden. Slow and steady no longer wins the race. Defense may no longer equal championships.

Free Bracey Wright!

American Gladiators were (and still are) Awesome

When I was a kid American Gladiators was the shit, but since they're never on anymore this fact had slipped my mind. A few weeks ago ESPN Classics started airing them again, they are more exciting now, but for entirely different reasons this time around.

The 1st thing that has stood out to me, maybe because I would have only been 7 years old in 1989, is that Joe Theisman was the host for the first season, how awesome is that. To be honest he has not changed a bit since then, he still blows. His Monday night job might be over, maybe he can get this gig going again, check this sparkling commentary out:



Go Joe!! You, unlike any other, can break down Powerball.

Another thing that is great is you get to see the late 80's and early 90's in all their big hair glory. The sweat suits were great also, the guy who did all of the post competition interviews in the early years always had a "kick ass" sweat suit. I remember how cool these things were, and I had no less then 5 of them.

Next up is Malibu, and no words can do this guy justice so here's anther video. Thanks Youtube.


Sweet!!

I bet all the gladiators were on so many steroids during this show. I can only find evidence of one being caught with steroids, and that was Gold (aka Tonya Knight), and the only reason she was caught was because she was in some sort of international competition. This picture isn't her but if this women is not on steroids or actually a man I don't know what to say.



That can't even be a women on steroids, it has to be a man doesn't it?

Anyways American Gladiators was awesome. Thank you ESPN (it feels weird thanking them) for bringing this back into my life. I have a feeling that this may only be part one, I keep finding more as the digging goes on. Check back for more....

Pick up Keyshawn! whats the worst that could happen?

Keyshawn Johnson just got cut by the Carolina Panthers. Please, for the love of god, pick him up Vikings! I know he runs his mouth, but he is a proven wide receiver and that is exactly what this team needs. He may get on his coaches nerves but Childress claims to be a disciplinary coach... lets see if that is true. Adding a player of this caliber may actually turn a team that's hoping for 6-7 wins into a playoff caliber team.

Maybe the guy could teach Troy Williamson how to catch the ball, maybe he could do the same with the incoming receivers and since there is no veteran quarterback on this Vikings squad he may also have picked up some things from his former QBs to pass on to Tarvaris. Keyshawn may not be a solid number one in most people's eyes but he is better than most twos and will benefit greatly from a running attack like the one the Vikings will possess next year.

A one year contract based on incentives can do no harm to this team... either its a failed experiment or something that helps out a young offensive squad.

Get to Know Your New Vikings

For the first year in god knows how long I’m actually happy about the picks that the Vikings made over the weekend. I didn’t want the purple to pick up Brady Quinn because the first word that pop into my head are choke artist… he’d be better suited as an Abercrombie model. Adrian Peterson is too much of a game breaker to pass up and forget all of that injury prone stuff, he’ll be healed by the time camp starts and he won’t be taking the majority of carries in the beginning. At the same time he will help Chester Taylor enough to stop him from hitting the wall as he did last year. Peterson will help sell some tickets and in turn keep games from being blacked out, so poor me can still watch the Vikes suck it up next year.

Chili and Co. also took 3 wide receivers. Sidney Rice came off the board in the second round. The second year man from South Carolina left early to support his mother who has a broken back, this is one of the few valid reasons I see for leaving college early. Williamson also came from SC and that scares a lot of people I’m more afraid of his inability to separate from the defense than anything else. Rice was also described as immature, but try picking out a better adjective for anyone who is 20 years old.

Aundrae Allison of East Carolina was picked up by the Vikings in the 5^th round and Chandler Williams of Florida International was our final pick. Williams managed to get himself suspended for 2 games while taking part in that melee with Miami, so come back in a few months to see the mug shot. The player taken shortly before Williams was QB Tyler Thigpen out of Coastal Carolina. Thigpen will probably become a practice squad guy.

Our Third round pick was spent on Fresno State CB Marcus McCauley. McCauley stuck around Fresno long enough to graduate and I respect that in a football player, it means that he is smart and not concerned with how much higher he could have been picked last year, plus he went out of his way to track down Reggie Bush when he had broken free showing that he has speed an tenacity.

Our 4^th round pick was Brian Robinson out of Texas. Robinson will rotate in and out with James and Udeze; basically his addition can only make a team that forgot what the sack was a little bit better. He only had 5 ½ last year, but was hurt for part of the season, but did have 6 career blocked kicks. The third and final defensive player taken by the Vikes was Rufus Alexander out of Oklahoma. Alexander will backup our linebackers and spend most of the season on the special teams unit. The cool thing about him is that as a junior he led the team in recorded tackles.

These players will not be the difference between a winning and losing season. Tarvaris Jackson will have a tough season adjusting to the starting job and we still have no number one receiver. People coming back from injury like Chad Greenway and Erasmus James will probably be more significant that everybody drafted but Peterson. As a Vikings fan your best bet is to look at the season as a rebuilding year.

Nobody on offense knows each other unless they're on the line. If your team can stuff the run like it did last year and learn how to pressure the quarterback we're looking at 7 wins. I'd like to see offensive strides from this team and a losing season... that way we end up with another nice draft pick the year after and a team that has had a season to adjust to each other.

Antoino Gates ain’t got S**t in the Vikes new Signee

And when I say that I mean former basketball turned wide receiver. I cannot wait to run out and buy my Todd Lowber Jersey! The former track and basketball star weighs in at 205 and stands 6-3 while running 4.3 in the 40-yard dash. The problem is that I’m 5-6 and 160 soaking wet, but am as accomplished as him on the football field… oh and his mentor will be Troy “Hands” Williamson. F@#k it… lets take a punter with the 7^th pick this year!

We signed this dude to a 3-year contract! Is there no such thing as a training camp contract? The Twins got Ponson on a Minor league contract; a dude with no experience should not be able to ink a 3-year deal like this. His agent said that there were other teams interested in Lowber, but he’d say that he were the emperor of China if it helped get this contract. Lowber played all 4 season of basketball at Ramapo College and won the D3 men’s high jump in ’06. Mr. Lowber averaged 12.4 pts and 5.2 rebs in his final college season. I watched Devon George play at Augsburg before he went to the NBA- a DIII player with “freakish talent” should average more than that on the court.

The Vikes are going to need a bucket of glue a la THE REPLACEMENTS if they want to pass the ball at all this season. I’m not so sure they’ll even attempt a pass after watching Chili’s “kick ass” offense tear up the field last year. It would be great if this worked out some how, but we are the Minnesota Vikings. I’m almost used to this sort of thing… at least they got a lot of valuable players when they got rid of Moss and Culpepper, right? Right?

My hopes for a 6-win season just got shot to shit. Thank you, oh wise ones for bestowing upon us such a great talent. We are blessed

Vikings sign an actual player

It looks like former Colts safety Mike Doss will reunite with Leslie Frazier. Doss missed the final 10 games of the season, but had he been able to continue it would have been his best season in the NFL outside of his rookie year. In his six games he recorded 29 tackles, had 2 interceptions, and 3 passes defended. Doss seems like a good player and all but I wonder why the Vikes went after another safety instead of a corner. Other players vying for a starting spot at safety include Darren Sharper, Dwight Smith, Tank Williams and Greg Blue. I’m not so sure that the Vikings have taken one look at the depth chart or even attempted to re-evaluate talent at any position prior to signing free agents. Like I said before if you played for a member of the coaching staff somewhere else you’ve got a great shot at making the team regardless of talent or position.

The Vikings have failed to pick up an extra quarterback, pass rusher, cornerback or wide receiver (you don’t count, Wade). I’ll watch the damn games this season, got nothing else to do on a Sunday, but this team is quickly approaching the “laugher” status. Brad Childress’ “kick-ass offense” is going to be worse off than it was last year and the defense, which actually does kick ass, has not even begun to fill in the holes necessary to make up for the fact that the team has nobody to throw the ball and even less people to catch it. Hindsight is 20-20, and man do I miss Mike Tice. Terry Ryan and Doug Risebrough need to do double duty and help out the Vikes and T-wolves with this whole “GM” thing.

Guess what these are.

Do you know what these two rocks represent. They're Troy Williamson's hands. The Vikings think it is something completely different. According to the awesome Pioneer Press today the Vikings have had Troy's eyes tested very meticulously, here is what they have to say:

"Vikings wideout Troy Williamson recently went to Nike's headquarters in Oregon to get his eyes looked at. Apparently he was subjected to a number of tests that checked out his hand-eye coordination, the strength of each eye, how well he sees in different lighting and how he judged balls coming at him from different angles. "The Vikings went above and beyond the call of duty," Williamson's agent told the Pioneer Press. "This shows how supportive the team is of Troy. This is not the normal eye doctor you would deal with. This is all encompassing."

I truly wonder what Chili's reaction to these results are going to be. I imagine it like somewhat this:

"Well Chili, his eyes seem to be fine, but we found something that we here at Nike think your team has overlooked." Says Dr. Knowall. "Troy here is not a football player, he's a track star. We feel that it is in the best interest of your team to let him go and find another wide reciever."
"Well Dr. Knowall," says Chili as he storms out of the Nike headquarters, "you seem to be the one missing something, this receiver is one KICK ASS receiver and he's going to be better then anything you could find in the NFL."

When Nike tells the Vikings that it's not his eyes, what do the Vikings do?? I'm pretty sure you can't teach "hands." So we will see, maybe they'll find some other big name receivers to fill the position.