Blog, I forgot all about you

Blog,
I'm sorry I have been gone for so long. You have been neglected. It's just that things haven't gone well in my sports universe lately. It has been hard, Iowa football sucks (some may say they always have (I won't be one of them)), The Twins sucked the season away, not that I care, but the Vikings blow (actually that's funny), and The Wild are just getting going (they got some help from drunk me, and friends Saturday).

I know I have made promises before to come back more often, and that usually is short lived, so this time I'm not making any promises, but I will try. I may need some motivations so here are a list of things a few things that make me happy:

1. The Yankee's season was only 4 games longer then the Twins. Go Indians.
2. I don't live in Chicago, suck it Bears, bring back Rexy already.
3. Ozzie Guillen will back next year.
4. Lists.
5. The Wild.
6. The NBA is back soon, which seems to give me plenty to write about.

That was short and sweet.

Anyway, If one doesn't work tomorrow afternoon, I suggest in tuning into ESPN2. Timberwolves vs Celtics in preseason play from Italy.

THANK YOU CHICAGO

With my past experience with the White Sox, I don't think I could be as happy for another team as I am right now. If you haven't heard the White Sox just extended Ozzie Guillen through 2012. This means we can expect them to fall apart year after year, until at least 2013, which is wonderful. Even though the Twins are DONE this season, life as a Twins fan is good.

Why no A.J.?

A.J. Pierzynski didn’t play in the final game of the Twins/ White Sox series today and we here at SPK decided some detective work was necessary. After a few calls and a bribery consisting solely of White Castle’s flavored chicken rings we were able to obtain a transcript of the conversation between Ozzie Guillen and A.J. prior to the game. Enjoy.

Ozzie: (yelling from his office) A.J., ged ing here! Joo god some ‘splaining to do.

A.J. : (enters the room with a wrestling belt around his shoulder) What’s up Oz?

Ozzie: I ayng Berry mad at joo A.J. Why joo godda spikey da NVP’s foot ayng make ada Twings bats work? No es bueno A.J.

A.J.: I don’t know what you’re talking about Oz. I’m a perfect angel and an all-star caliber catcher.

Ozzie: No, joo is mine least favoritest player ayng I hab hated hated joo frong day one.

A.J.: that kinda harsh Oz, I thought you said you liked me.

Ozzie: No, I tell dat (censored) Mariotti ang da media dat we hates joo less causen joos ong da team. Day god 40 hits ing two ganes, A.J. Joo pisses dem off ayng den joo calls a bad gane? Day gonna bean joo for chure if I puts joo out dare today.

A.J.: Come on Oz! I was thinking of sliding into Castillo to try and mess up his knees again today!

Ozzie: Das bad beisbol A.J. joo godda learn dat joo cang jus do dat.

A.J. What if I got Redmond to punch me in the face? Is that bad baseball?

Ozzie: I hate joo A.J.

A.J.: But he’s going to punch me.

Ozzie I’n gonna pun joo ing da face. I wich we coo ged songting in a trade for joo like da Twings. Joo godda sit today, I ayng playing Toby.

A.J.: that’s bullshit Oz, I’m gonna call up all the talk radio in Chicago.

Ozzie: goo, I’n don give a sheet, call de Springer too. Ged oudda her, I godda ting of a nicknangs for de new Twings pitchers.

The twins swept the Sucks today in fantastic fashion. I fell asleep when it was 4-6 and woke up when it was 7-6. A.J. wasn't on the field and the Twins didn't need Redmond's .320 Batting average or Castillo's .334 average. Thats 7/8 games, 47 hits in this last series and a good feeling about my favorite baseball team. When Mauer and Rondell White get back I have a feeling we'll bring it to the rest of the A.L. Central.

LUNCH BREAK: Safe At Home Edition

In the past a road trip by one of the writers on this site would have been accompanied by photo like the one above, but nowhere near as sexy. If I have time later this week I may elaborate on the art of a CD case as a projectile. Until then stare a Sarah Silverman for a while and click on some of the links below.

Is your baseball team getting what it paid for?

A Fan’s View from Section 220 tells Twins fans that 2 out of three ain’t bad, but it’s not time to rejoice yet. Also, Dick Bremer can predict the future.

10,000 Takes has found the world’s tallest (and worst) Baseball player ever.

KG for Shawn Marion? I’m willing to entertain that idea.

Roger Goodell’s NFL is Bass ackwards. Did they make Adrian Peterson do this?

The Wild plan on holding onto Backstrom (via 10000 takes)

Chipper Jones hates inter league baseball and Ozzie Guillen has anger issues.

Free Darko hates on the Spurs and gives us a James White video… I consider that a double bonus.

At this point I’d rather read about NCAA basketball than watch the eventual defeats of the Cavs and Jazz.

God the White Sox are @#$*!!!!

We here at Some-Peoples-Kids have an utter disdain for the Chicago White Sox after a certain incident at U.S Cellular last August landed AdamBez at the first precinct station and myself roaming the south side of Chicago in Twins apparel, trying to find a ride home. Our abhorrence has manifested itself for most of the off season and now will be let out in a torrid of blog entries whenever our Twins play the Sox.

Tonight starts the first series of the season between the Twins and Sox at U.S Cellular and we should see quit the pitchers duel between Javier Vazquez and Carlos Silva. The Twins will hopefully continue to get timely hitting and pray that Silva lasts more than three innings. As for the Sox, they have been on the receiving end of Cleavland's offensive punishment and only squeaked out their first win yesterday when Cleavland's bullpen collapsed in the ninth.

Before the game starts we'd like to thank A.J. Pierzynski for being ok enough to con the Giants out of two little known pitchers by the name of Joe "the savior" Nathan and Mr. Fransisco "El General" Lariano. Quite frankly A.J. is a bitch and a dirty player, but he's not our problem. Actually hes a a big reason this team looks the way it does. We'd also like to thank Contraras for being 1 million years old... If we're thanking the White Sox for being old we might as well thank all of their sluggers, too.

Those bitches on the southside can't even properly bean someone. They all follow A.J.'s dirty lead. One of the best parts of their game may be "small ball" this existed in their World Series run and was then totally forgotten outside of talking to the media. The only reason they'll get more write-ups at SPK is an inexplicable disdain for the Sox, and everything either White or Sockey. Frankly we're more worried about the Indians and Detroit.

Any team that gives its best asian player a nickname that sounds like a woman's "southside" does not deserve the respect of a fine blog like ours. In fact the only person that doesn't get completely ripped apart during a Sox-Twins conversation is Ozzie. The man has said many things that he probably shouldn't have; but he speaks his mind, has a funny accent, swears like a sailor in television interviews, respects the Twins and always-always ends up chewing his team out by the third game of our season.