Retirement is probably a good thing, Brett

If Brett Favre does come out of retirement he's only going to make it one game. The Vikings were supposed to open the season and watch Favre's jersey retired at half time. If old man river does decide to play this season the Vikings will be on hand to see the man's final retirement.

I can see it now. Just before halftime the Packers have the ball a good 60 yards from their endzone and a tie game. In the Packers huddle Farve tells Greg Jennings, Donald Driver and whoever else they throw on the field to go long. In the Vikings huddle Jared Allen tells Ray Edwards that he'll meet him at the quarterback. The addition of Madieu Williams and the maturation Cedric Griffin and Marcus McCauley leave no cracks in the secondary for Favre to laser a pass through. As is his habit Brett holds onto the ball for too long looking to make something special out of nothing. Allen and Edwards crash into Favre simultaneously. There is a *SNAP* and a fumble. The fumble is taken the 40 or so yards down the field by Kevin Williams for a touchdown. The snap is the end of the hall of famer's career.

We spend the next week listening to ESPN debate whether or not Favre ever should have come back even though they've spent all of today applauding him for his decision.

If Brett can't make a decision about retirement the Vikings will make it for him. We need Tarvaris Jackson to be the best quarterback in the NFC Central and if it has to be by default this season we'll take it.

Vikings now convinced that Erasmus James sucks too

The Vikings waived Erasmus James today. This makes myself and about 5 million others very happy. I didn't want Brian Robison and Ray Edwards losing playing time because James was once a first round pick and the team thought he'd be fully recovered one day. Maybe he can con Mike Tice into clearing a spot on the Jags roster for him right next to our OTHER first round draft pick from 2005.

Lets review... the pro-bowlers we could have selected instead of Williamson are Shawne Merriman, Jammal Brown or Demarcus Ware. We also could have selected Mark Clayton or Reggie Brown if you want to stick with Wide Receivers. The pro-bowlers we could have selected instead of James are Logan Mankins, Lofa Tatupu, Justin Miller, Frank Gore, Marrion Barber the III (home town!), Trent Cole (DE!) or Derrick Anderson. I also would have much rather had Justin Tuck, who will shortly become a pro-bowler as my Defensive End.

I understand that hindsight is 20/20 but this just helps underline the previous administration's ineptitude. Head over to the Daily Norseman to look at the list of all the Vikings drafted in 2005 and their lack lack of starting jobs. Having Cole/Tuck and Clayton/Brown instead of Erasmus James and Troy Williamson would have been way better. At least the new administration has given us hope for this and future vikings draft classes after only two drafts.

Dat Defense is D-D-D-Dangerous

The Vikings have acquired Jared Allen from the Chiefs for what appears to be a hefty price, though Allen will almost definatly prove his worth alongside the Williams boys. According to Jay Glazer, who at this moment is the only member of the media giving actual figures, the Vikings will give up their 1st (17th overall) and both of their 3rd round picks (73rd and 82nd). Glazer also says that Allen's new contract will make him the highest paid defensive player in the league.

The deal is for six years and just under $74 million, including a stunning $31,000,069 guaranteed — 69 is his jersey number.

Allen has a red flag on his record for having 2 DWIs but the Vikings say they've taken a long hard look into his background and believe him when he says that he hasn't had a drop to drink in over a year. He does, however, still own Jared Allen's Sports Arena and Grill. You need to look at that link, the man serves "Jared Juice" consisting of fruit punch and EVERCLEAR and the motto is "Wine 'em, Dine 'em and 69 'em." Classy, Mr. Allen

The Vikings are left with the 47th overall pick (Secondary?), the 117th pick (4th round, QB?), the 150th pick (5th round, no clue) switched picks in the 6th round giving us the 170th (if that info is incorrect we draft 182) 193rd (Thanks for that Tice), 209 in the 7th round for trading Adam Goldberg to the Rams. Its strange to thing that only 16 spots make up the difference in talent level between Troy Williamson and Adam Goldberg. Here is a look at where every team picks as of 3 days ago.

As most of you know Allen lead the league in sacks last year with 15.5 and has averaged over 10 a year in his 4 years as a professional. This spot was a definate need after Kenechi Udezi was diagnosed with leukemia. It was already fairly weak considering Erasmus James' knee problems. Ray Edwards will most likely start opposite Allen with Brian Robison and James filling. Edwards and Robison combined for 9.5 sacks last year and with the Williams wall and Allen commanding the line I expect that number to increase... they only have 3 years experience between the two of them.

We've got six picks left, filled in the gaping hole that will make our passing D much better than before, and the sickest runner to hit the NFL in many, many years. God, L.A. is going to love this team.

Get Off My Team

The season is over for the Minnesota Vikings and now its time for the coaching staff evaluate each of the players and make some decisions about who should stay and who should go. As a professional know nothing I've decided to do my own evaluating. The Star Tribune has a list of all the Vikings free agents which could come in handy for those of you following along.

The first person I want off my team is TROY WILLIAMSON. I've seen blind guys with better hands than this waste of space... I'm so glad we traded the best wide receiver still playing for Williamson and Napoleon Harris cause that totally worked in our favor. Red McCombs is getting a shank in the side if I ever run into him. Robert Ferguson is a free agent and though I'm not a huge fan of Ferguson I'd rather resign him and drop Williamson and look for an actual number one receiver. Free agents to look into are Andre Davis, Bernard Berrian, that's about it since Patrick Crayton signed his contract.


Up next is Brooks Bollinger and Kelly Holcomb. I want them both gone, I want someone who can actually compete with Tarvaris Jackson for the number one spot (Quinn Gray? Cleo "Fucking" Lemon?) and I want to use a fourth - Sixth round pick on a QB. Lets draft our own Tom Brady or Tony Romo.
Dwight Smith must also leave. he can't tackle Clinton Portis, he can't keep his thing in his pants and he can't wait until the offseason to smoke copious amounts of ganja. Take note current Vikings players the off season and the comfort of your own home is the ideal place to get high. I don't care if it helps with pain, its against the law for some reason and we can't be busting players out of jail on Saturday nights so they can play the next morning. Re-sign Tank Williams and get another safety through the draft or try to pick up someone like Gibril Wilson

Ryan Cook. God Damn Retard.
Erasmus James. Play a game. 5 sacks and 30 tackles in 23 games is no good and he's played 8 games in the last two seasons. I hate the fact that Childress favors James above Ray Edwards and Brian Robinson.

People I will miss.
Meweldi Moore is almost certainly gone, but I think hes one hell of a football player who found himself in an unfavorable position.
Spencer Johnson will most likely find a new home this off season but he is the man that gives the Willaims boys breaks without anybody noticing it.

This Kid Looks Hungry Too

...For Yards! Purple Jesus done done it again setting a record for most yards in a game with 296. Wanna know whose going to break that record? Adrian Peterson... Kid is a freaking rookie, he's got time to improve his game. Purple Jesus is crazy ridiculous. Nobody can touch him, and if they do he just knocks them over and keeps on going. Somebody should figure out how many yards he averages after first contact cause I'm willing to bet it better than a lot of starting running backs regular average per carry. Oh yeah, and his line did a great job. Especially that right side that gets so much flack, Ryan Cook and Anthony Herrera. I kind of think the key to the line was starting Herrera.

As for the rest of the team stuff went well. Tarvaris Jackson got injured again... If Adrian Peterson is Purple Jesus Tarvaris Jackson has to be Purple Judas. I know that early in the season I was pulling for Jackson and calling for Bollinger to be cut, but Jackson has proven nothing but the fact that he holds the ball too long, passes the ball too far away from the receivers and his bones are made of china. Bollinger hasn't done too much but he was 7/10 for 95 yards, 40 of which went to Sidney Rice for a TD.

The D-Line held LT to 40 yards. An amazing feat considering he is the best back in the league not wearing purple. Ray Edwards had a great game on the outside of the line. The secondary did a great job, too. Antonio Gates didn't exist, yet another amazing feat. The third amazing feat was that the secondary held their own with a combined 5 years of experience at corner. Cedric Griffin is a solid second year guy, Marcus McCauley is a rookie who has been targeted for much of the year and Charles Gordon got an interception.

The only thing I was not happy about was Chilli's field goal attempt at the end of the half. We had a tie game and were out of Longwell's range. That could have killed us. Last year that would have killed us. I still have no faith in Childress. Its just too easy to call a run play for number 28 and get an automatic first down. If Childress wants my vote of confidence he needs to show me something like a comeback win that takes an air attack.

I didn't think Peterson would have a better game than the one against the Bears this year, but I was pleasantly surprised. Hopefully we can do the same against the Pack next week.

P.S. we scored more than 24 points.

Marques Colston know how to catch a football

I saw this on the Fanhouse and had to share it with the rest of you. Did you notice that there was only one take? Thats real skill, and he didn't even need red contacts to see the thing coming! Someone refresh my memory, who did we pick while he was still on the board? Greg Blue and Ray Edwards... I could live without Blue. I think Edwards was a solid pick, though.