Some People's Kids: In Theaters Tomorrow…

Thursday, March 15, 2007

In Theaters Tomorrow…

All right, gotta do this super quick because I just got off work and the tourney has already started… PREMONITION stars Sandra Bullock and is probably a bad attempt at a time shifting thriller. You’re still alive Sandra? I thought your career died years ago along with MISS CONGENIALITY, THE LAKE HOUSE, and as I look at your filmography basically everything except for speed.

DEAD SILENCE is a horror film that looks to be the heir to the CHUCKY throne. It looks weak, but the dude behind the SAW franchise wrote it so it might be worth your money. Plus Marky Mark’s brother is in the film and doesn’t play the lead… I’ve got a feeling we can fulfill the fantasy of watching a New Kid On The Block die a horrible, horrible death.

I THINK I LOVE MY WIFE is Chris Rock’s new picture. He pulled a Charlie Chaplin and played lead, director and producer on this film. I want to think that it will be good be he has disappointed me in the past (he is the producer who brought us POOTIE TANG). He may be better at stand-up than choosing film projects. (Osmosis Jones?) The comedian Louis C.K. helped write the script but he may have the same problem as Rock. (Once again, POOTIE TANG)

Box Office prediction goes something like this: 300 takes spots 1-3 because if they are not politely offered the film will simply fill you will arrows, cut your heart out with a rusty spork and make love to your girlfriend in front of you for the last remaining seconds of your life. I’d like to say that DEAD SILENCE takes 4th but its probably WILD HOGS, then SILENCE. Taking 6th is I THINK I LOVE MY WIFE. This took far to long. Go see 300, dammit.

Free Bracey Wright!

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